Hello potential peer reviewers. I would like to preface with the fact that I wrote a pro-Trump argument, so I would like you to go into my paper with an open mind. I feel as though a weakness in my paper was that I did not address all potential counter arguments to my argument. So if you know of any counter arguments to what I discussed I would appreciate it if you would detail them.
I think you did well to create a strong intro paragraph and it definitely does its job of catching the readers attention. You are able to use a narrative-esque opening in order to draw focus to your thesis, however I think you immediately lose some of this focus and lose some of the strength of your essay in your second paragraph. The thesis talks about defending Trump based on his policies but then you immediately follow it up by trying to defend his personality. From this you stray off topic and lose the focus you once had, so my suggestion is to get rid of the second paragraph completely or simply modify your thesis so that this second paragraph doesn’t seem so off topic. I think this one modification would greatly help your essay and help reestablish that strong attention you command in your readers.
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ReplyDelete-Joshua Smith